As I have posted before (excitedly) I took a super part-time job as a Water Aerobics/Water Babies instructor at a pool about 20 minutes from our house. I had attended the class while pregnant as something to keep me 'limber' during the winter months of my pregnancy. It was really low-key and the prior instructor became a very good friend of mine. Because I was already certified as a First Responder, which is basically a terrestrial lifeguard, I was eligible to take this job, even though I have to attain my lifeguard certification. The low-key part was what got me to sign on. My friend who had done the job for 5 years had started when SHE had her 6 month old baby with her...so, since Little Bug was 10 months at the time, I figured it would only get easier. Surely it was fate that another mama would find the job & be able to bring her little guy to swim too. 4 hours a week. I could handle that.
HAH! I am starting to dread these FOUR HOURS after only one month of fulfilling the position. At first I thought 2 hours (Wednesday Water Babies and Water Aerobics are back to back) was just too much for the little guy to be in a pool. Understandable. So, dear, sweet hubby takes an hour off work to play with Bug while I teach. Great. Until a few clients complained that they didn't get a good enough workout when he was with me. So, feeling self-conscious about having the kiddo there, I tried to do my best to work the snot out of them the next time.
PSH. They got a better workout, but it was really shitty, the last 15 minutes which are supposed to be calming stretches were spent hastily going through the motions while Little Bug screamed on my hip. Super. So dad started taking him more. Grandpa chipped in a day here or there. My mom came last Wednesday to help out with him (any excuse is good enough for her to drop everything & visit!)
Last Monday was a fiasco. True, he had just spent 4 straight days of undivided play and attention for his 1st birthday, so having to go back to the grind might have been a bummer for him, maybe? But we got about 10 minutes into the hour-long exercise class and he whined. So I got out of the pool with him and taught from the deck. He whined. I get back in the pool with him. Splash and play like a dork while still trying to teach a class. Whining turns to crying. We get back out and bang on the window, looking outside, while I steal glances at the clock and will it to speed up. More whining. Then comes the fit. Throwing his head, sitting down, slipping along the floor (as I hold his hand and attempt to still teach the class...) So, with 15 minutes left, I quickly dress him, and haul him out to the car. I parked directly in front of the pool window/fire exit door so I could stand 5 feet from him and keep an eye on him. I knew as soon as I ran out of the pool room my students were either talking about what a rotten kid I have, what a rotten mom I am, or both. I was so embarrassed. Then I felt guilty about the embarrassment. I called my husband bawling after I had tried to maintain my professional composure until we left the parking lot. I felt bad for resorting to leaving him in the car, even though I all but drove into the pool room with my car. I knew he just wanted to nap, and as soon as he got into the carseat he did--I wouldn't have let him scream in the car... My class told me they could stretch on their own, so I ended up leaving anyway. Epic Failure. That situation sucks so bad--Little Bug is upset, I'm upset, and the students are no doubt upset, since they pay for my instructing service and got 1/2 at best of my attention.
I prepared as best I could. We had slept in until 8:30. I had given him Tylenol 1/2 hour before class so that it would ease teething pain. Ugh! On Wednesdays, I teach Waterbabies right before Aerobics. Last week, 3 little ones were crying and whining almost the entire 1/2 hour, including Little Bug. This Wednesday was no exception, but thankfully I had mom to help while I taught the adult class. It's supposed to be fun, so I feel bad when he doesn't have fun. I hope my little fish isn't learning to HATE the pool! Or worse, WATER! But, then again, he loves puddling in the sink/bathtub...
So now, I feel like after only a month, it's is OBVIOUSLY not worth hubby taking 4 hours off his Family-Supporting bread-winner job to take the Bug for my $200+/- job... But, I feel bad quitting and leaving them in the lurch, because I'm not really a quitter. This was such a 'good plan' in my mind! Perfect for a SAHM, right? I hope it works out. It's lame to whine about it, but it really is stressing me out. So I'm whining!
I called 6 different people whom I would trust my child with for an hour that would also be available during the right timeframe. None of them could help me out tomorrow. So.....As this MANIC MONDAY begins, I am off to class, baby in tow. I hope the class doesn't try to drown me. Crossing my fingers for one hour of smiles and happiness from the little man....