Paying for College, Crab and Sloths

I had about $30k of college debt after I graduated. I had my dream job and a decent paycheck. I hated my boss. So I quit, started a family and married some more debt! It's the American Dream, folks!

If I won or found or somehow ended up with a million dollars one morning, I'd pay off my college debt (which is substantially less now) and I'd put away a substantial amount FOR my son's education, which when he gets there will probably be about half of the million alone. Unless the end of the world would have hit by then, because at that point, I'm sure I could get him some great "educational experiences" for a couple of pounds of potatoes and a rabbit or two! So, I might have about $500K left when the almighty dollar is rendered worthless...then I'd just burn it for warmth and fire-starting material!

If there was any money leftover at all, I'd pay down some of our land debt and then find myself (or fly in) a Snow Crab feast. Recently, one of the only restaurants I've ever known in the landlocked Midwest quit serving its' all-you-can-eat crab dinner. I stopped going there after that. So, I need a crab fix pretty bad. Gone are the days of pulling up my own crab pots and eating them on top of a garbage bag spread on the kitchen floor of my efficiency apartment, cracking them with scissors--I blame the shitty boss for that. 

So, there you have it. That's what my million would go toward within the 12 or so hour span that I could use it. With the exception of the college fund for my son, I wouldn't save a dime. I'd like to also send some money to a Sloth Rehabilitation Center in Costa Rica and about a million other 'greenie' and 'bunny-hugger' type places, and I'd like to spay a WHOLE BUNCH of rural cats and dogs in my area. But, a million only goes so far people! 

It's kind of a sad thought, that A MILLION DOLLARS JUST ISN'T ENOUGH -- but when I'm so far away from ever having that amount of cash on hand, at once, there is so much I'd like to do with it. So many people and animals and causes I'd love to help monetarily. And ultimately, all of that philanthropy just makes you feel warm and fuzzy! I cannot imagine the selfish high of pay-it-forward goodness that people must feel who ARE ABLE to donate like that! Wow!


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